Dirty Hoes!!

Warning: 18Plus

I was chatting to a UK friend of mine the other day and this subject came up.  He told me that in the clubs in London, people often have sex right there in the dark corners or in the bathrooms.  This is what he said.  Whaaaat!  I haven't seen this in all my long gone partying days in Nairobi, and we partied a lot!! I don't know what it's like now, maybe some of my younger, still partying friends can enlighten me? 

My late brother was the DJ at what was then known as "Visions" and there were a couple of burly bouncers who took care of any over enthusiastic shows of affection before they got out of hand.  I DO remember seeing young couples snogging in the corner at the famous Carnivore but thankfully nothing more.  Maybe this was going on but I didn't see this as I was always busy dancing my night away.  There were always prostitutes there trying to hook up with "clients" so they could leave and go do it in some seedy hotel room or quickies in the cars or whatever.

The question is this: when we see a woman selling her body for money then we can define her as a prostitute, but what do we call the women who just feel like getting some and go trawling in  clubs for it?  Maybe she's in between boyfriends, or divorced or whatever so she sees nothing wrong in behaving like many men do.  If she needs it, she goes out and she gets it, without getting paid, or paying anyone.  What is she called?   Can she be termed a whore if money doesn't change hands? Some people may even think she has a right to fulfill her needs as she sees fit.  Is it not just a basic need like eating and sleeping?  But on the other hand, aren't we women emotional creatures?  And is the driving force really just a physiological need for sex or an inner desire to feel loved and wanted?   Sometimes a woman (or a man) just needs to be held.  Maybe this is the closest thing to a cuddle they can get?  I do feel sorry for these women and I am not one to judge, that is Allah's Supreme right.  All I know is loneliness is a terrible thing and I pray that we never get desperate enough to allow our bodies to be used just to get some short lived male attention. 

By the way,  I have a bone to pick with some of  you men: C'mon! step up and pick up the slack, there are so many good women waiting for you, and why do you always prefer bitches anyways?  That's another post for another day once I've read THIS book by Sherry Argov....

Wow! It's Getting Hot Again

I feel so bad! I have been neglecting my blog, life has taken over every second of my day and I can hardly find five minutes to catch up and put my thoughts into words. And the weather is back to "HOT HOT HOT".  Temperatures have been soaring and tempers at work have been flaring.  It seems people are talking at high volume this week and it's driving me insane!.  What's going on? 

Update: Mr. Big Staring Eyes has been transferred to another department so I no longer have to tolerate his goggly eyes on me, eww!  But I do feel bad for him because he was demoted from being a Team Leader, to 'just" a Senior Engineer.  I swear I had nothing to do with it!!  He must have made the wrong people mad....

What Most Women Know

Once, a married frenemy of mine was very upset because she had found out that her husband had been cheating on her. She had been suspicious for a while and she had done some snooping around and a lot of threats and tears later, he confessed. Nobody would have believed it if he had not confessed. He was always at work or at home.  He used to go to the gym three times a week and was always accessible by mobile phone.  So when did he meet this other woman?  He never missed a single prayer and I remember at that time we had discussed how he could reconcile praying 5 times a day with cheating on his wife.  I didn't tell her this but I was sure that he was not cheating, he had actually married that woman and kept her in a flat secretly.  She smashed her car into his and ended up having her license suspended for a year.

It was no shock to me. I knew men do this because it had happened to me. (another long story for another day). At that time, my frenemy thought I was stupid and probably not tough enough so I "brought it on myself". (That's why she's a frenemy).  Anyway, it was no surprise to me when her husband cheated.  What surprised me was her feeling that it could never happen to her when really,  in this part of the world almost every woman gets married with the knowledge that sooner or later, her husband will turn around and either cheat or marry another woman, or both.  There is no security, you get married, have your kids, and your hubby gets bored and marries another woman only to get bored again.  Then he'll say that he is "too much man for one woman".  Or that he always wanted to marry a woman from such and such a place, or it's in man's nature to want variety and blah blah blah! We've heard it all before.  The way these man abuse the laws of Allah never ceases to amaze me. The best most of us hope for is a (very rare) husband who fears Allah enough to take care of his responsibilities the way he should no matter how many women he marries.

What most men do NOT seem to remember is that their wives get bored of them too. 
Most men do not do anything to keep their wives interested in them.  They think that if a woman is provided with food and shelter then she should thank God. We do thank God for His Provisions even though most of these men never thank Allah for the good women that they are blessed to be partnered with.  They are no prize themselves, nothing special. All they have going for them is the fact that they are MALE, sitting around in tatty clothes, only grooming themselves when they go out for others to see them. To those men I say: How about looking good for your wife? How about treating her like a human being who needs attention, love, humour, intellectual stimulation and romance?  How about treating her like a PARTNER and NOT someone put on this earth solely to satisfy your needs? You save your best behaviour, jokes and respect for strangers, but at home you are  rude, unloving and merciless towards your wife and children.  You don't even have a kind word or smile for her.  You are not a man.  Only a badly brought up human being not taking care of the blessings that Allah gave you in the way that you were ordered to.  I speak for all wives who are fed up of their ungrateful husbands taking them for granted.

Peace out.

Copy / Paste

If you, like me, grew up elsewhere it will drive you insane when you see how some ("some' not all!) of the people here want to be rewarded for just being nationals.  They want certificates without getting an education, and they will take any shortcuts to get what they want. They cheat in exams and pay teachers to give them better grades.  They use hidden bluetooth headsets to listen to the answers from their partners in crime hiding in the corridor outside the exam rooms. All their assignments and thesis are copy /pasted from the internet.  Copy/paste is their best friend in this whole world.

A colleague came to me last week for help.  Her sister is in university and she had to do a  paper entiltled  "Factors that Affect Consumer Taste in Different Parts of the World".  (btw, we did this in 'A' Level Economics). She was very upset because they were told by their professor that he wanted them to do their own research and express it in their own words.  "Haram!" she said "How could he expect them to do that?  Maskinah my sister, she's crying, she can't do it, he is so mean, so cruel!  Please help her!" 

So her sister copy/pasted someone else's work from the internet and sent it to me to condense it into 1500 words and diguise it to look like it was originally done by her.  I did it because I am too kind, I should have just said NO, let her use her brains and write her own paper. Let her EARN her degree/diploma or whatever it was.  But I was sure she would not understand. She would think I am jealous of the fact that she's a national, sailing her way through university without doing any actual work or learning. She probably thinks that all of us want certificates without the education to back it up. After all these years, I know these characters well, so to avoid drama, I just rewrote it to make it look like "her own" and sent it back to her. It took me all of 25 minutes.  I wonder what grade I got?  I hope it was an "A"! 
I can see her a few years from now, clueless, crying again at the unfairness of it all, because they did not promote her after 3 months of mediocrity in her chosen field.

That's the UAE, baby!

Btw, I am so thankful to Allah for allowing my parents to provide me the education that they did. 

There Are Still Some Men

Just the other day, I was waiting in the car for my son to come out of the shop.  (I can do that now that he's old enough. Alhamdulillah)


Anyway, as I was sitting there I glanced across at the little play area they have outside the Co-op.  They have those noisy, nursery rhyme playing, mechanical rocking horses that toddlers can't seem to get enough of.  I saw a man leaning against the wall carrying a little baby.  He was totally absorbed! He had eyes only for the baby and my heart was suddenly flooded with emotion as he kissed the baby so very tenderly that his eyes closed, and then opening his eyes, he smiled at the baby with so much love. My eyes filled with tears.


Thank you Allah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'ala) for reminding me that there are still some men who know how to love their children. 

2011 is Full of Surprises

This year has started off like a huge sack of unknown things where you don't know what you're going to pull out every time you reach into it.  That guy in Tunis who immolated himself in the town square sure as h*** had no idea that his life-ending action would oust the president of his nation.  When that Egyptian guy decided to call for a demonstration in Tahrir Square via Facebook, he had no inkling that it would change the history of his country and determine a new future for the next generations.  And now Libya!  Life's like that, you never know what will happen next.

Allah Subhaanahu wa Ta'ala says in Surah Luqman Verse 34:

إِنَّ اللَّهَ عِنْدَهُ عِلْمُ السَّاعَةِ وَيُنَزِّلُ الْغَيْثَ وَيَعْلَمُ مَا فِي الْأَرْحَامِ وَمَا تَدْرِي نَفْسٌ مَاذَا تَكْسِبُ غَدًا وَمَا تَدْرِي نَفْسٌ بِأَيِّ أَرْضٍ تَمُوتُ إِنَّ اللَّهَ عَلِيمٌ خَبِيرٌ

Surely Allah is He with Whom is the knowledge of the hour, and He sends down the rain and He knows what is in the wombs; and no one knows what he shall earn on the morrow; and no one knows in what land he shall die; surely Allah is Knowing, Aware.

May Allah strengthen our faith to face whatever comes to us with patience and correctness, amin.

Who Cares?

An infamous tyrannical leader criticised his fellow tyrant when his population revolted against the widespread hunger and food shortages in his country.  He said: "Mjinga yule! That idiot!  He kept his people too hungry!  I told him many times,  feed them just enough, but not too much.  They must  always be kept preoccupied with looking for the next piece of bread to organize and revolt!". An infamous  tyrant actually said that ( a friend of his uncle's cousin's daughter's son told my friend's cousin's neighbour). 

So it turns out, there's a fine and delicate balance expertly maintained by well experienced tyrants in power.  They graciously give the people "just enough" to have a glimmer of hope for a better day,  keeping them just passive enough.  That's how they keep progress down in poverty stricken countries.  What about in places where there is plenty to eat and folks are not scratching the earth for the next meal?  What about in places that are earthquake free, tornado and natural disaster free? People in these places are free to develop and grow their minds, now that their bodies are well fed, but they don't?  Why? What are we preoccupied with so that we don't think to better our lives?  Scroll down for the answer:

They preoccupy our minds with utterly, useless, brain cell destroying, mindless trivia.  They bombard us with this junk on a second to second basis through the thousands of useless tv channels (radio and other media channels are also guilty).

We are too busy with what mindless comment Haifa Wehbe made on some lame talk show to actually nurture our own and our children's minds with education and religion, and therefore better ourselves.  Who is being thrown out this week in Star Academy? What did Brangelina wear to the Oscars?  Is Lindsay Lohan back in rehab?  Is that a baby bump Beyonce is trying to hide?  Did Jay Z have a nose job?

Who cares?  Who cares? Who cares? Apparently a lot of people do!  Enough to generate billions of advertisement dollars and enough to keep people busy trying to play catch up with people we will never meet.  It's all about the money.  Advertisements to keep us in the shopping malls buying things they so cleverly convince us that we need.

We are told what is the most desirable car, phone, woman, man, house, toys, and everything else so that we are so busy trying to acquire those things that we never open our eyes to see that we are living lives entirely empty of substance,  quality and spiritual growth and depth. We are so busy and so blinded by trivial pursuits that we cannot see what is not right in our own societies and indeed in our own homes.  We have no time for character building. 

The good news is this tactic apparently did not work to keep the Egyptians down because to my knowledge, Egyptian tv is mega saturated with trivia with hardly a youth oriented educational channel in sight.  So the stomachs and the minds of everyone were hungry.  Yet the Egyptian youth still did not allow the wool to continue to be pulled over their eyes. There's hope yet.  *Climbs off a very high horse*