Thank You All!

I just want to thank you people who have been reading this blog and my two followers (praying for you, Um Q).  Thanks everyone!

I've added an RSS feed to the top right hand corner of my page for those of you who want to be updated on any new posts or comments. You can receive updates on your mobile phone.  All you have to do is click on the orange button labelled "Subscribe to The Same as it Never Was". Then pick your reader of choice, e.g., myYahoo, Google Reader, Atom, etc.  You can schedule your RSS reader to check for updates every 12 hours,  daily or whatever. It's very handy because I sometimes find a site I like and I want to go back and read more but unless I bookmark it, I may not find it again.  So RSS comes in and save the day. I've set my RSS reader to  check sites I'm subscribed to daily for new content and notify me.


You can read more about RSS feeds here where you'll find a much better explanation than mine.

Keeping up with the Idiots!

 Show offs are just idiots trying to look interesting.  Even worse, they are trying to look interesting to people who either (a) don't give a damn!! or (b) are idiots themselves.

If you have to borrow a whole years salary to pay for that expensive holiday so you can bore your friends to tears with the 700+ pictures of you sitting in the airport, getting on the plane, stepping into the taxi, stepping out of the taxi, entering the hotel room, trying out the bed, brushing your teeth, changing into your pyjamas, etc., then you should probably skip vacation this year.  Staying home this year will be excellent not only for your pocket, but for our poor eyes.  It's better all round for the sanity of your fellow human beings!

If you haven't been able to pay your three maids their salaries for the past 6 months then you have to rethink your lifestyle, How about teaching your older kids how to use the washing machine, the iron and the vacuum?  Then you can let one of those poor, overworked girls go.  What's that you say?  Manual work is below you?  If our own Prophet Muhammed (SalAllahu alayhi wasallam) could wash and mend his own clothes, sweep his own floors and  prepare his own food, who are you to look down on that?

If you're going to be paying for your luxury car at 4% interest for the next 6 years, then you should have gone for that less expensive model, you'd have been done by now. 
What's that? As if!! You'll be damned if you're going to buy a cheaper car than your neighbour and you sure as heck are not going to drive that same old car for 6 whole years.  Next year, you'll sell it off and let someone else finish paying for it.  Then you'll take another huge loan to buy the latest luxury car you cannot afford. After all, you would rather go to jail than be seen in a 3 year old car. On your release, you can always tell everyone you were on a long vacation in the South of France.

You and your wife go to Dragon Mart (China Mall) because you can get shiny things at a reasonable price.  At Dragon Mart, you can buy that gigantic chandelier made with "Xhmalooski" crystals (the Chinese cousins of the Swarovskis) . People will "ooh!" and "aah!" when they see it glittering above your shiny furniture which you purchased with one of your many bank loans. And they will think you are millionares since only millionares can afford chandeliers.  Your wife instructs you, "If anyone asks you where we bought it, let's tell them "Dubai Mall"".

What's wrong with just saying "China Mall"??  Hey! Don't you know that many of those shiny things in Dubai Mall are also made in China???  Oh I see!  Bargains are for poor people. God forbid you should look like a sensible shopper who looks for bargains.

Must....look......rich......or...die...trying...must......NOT......look......poor.

We would all be so much happier if we realised that ultimately, in front of Allah, it's not what we HAVE,  it's what we ARE that really matters.

Frenemies Forever!

There are friends, there are enemies, and then there are frenemies. 

Frenemy:   A person who pretends to be a friend, whilst all the time demeaning you and trying to destroy or claim for themselves your self esteem, your reputation, your style, your achievements and anything good you may have.

Alhamdulillah, I recently got rid of one. I'll just give you a small example of the type of things she did.  If I bought a pair of shoes, she would say "Are those from Aldo?  I saw them but meh!".  Next time I see her she's bought the exact, same shoes and she would make it a point to inform me smugly "I have those shoes". And she did this also with perfumes, mobile phones, handbags and anything I had.  Wtf!!  I guess she didn't like them enough until she saw them with me!

She told everyone that she and I are exactly the same. NOOOOOOT!! 
I am not an insecure, impolite and selfish human. She was jealous of my friends and would insist on meeting them. I introduced her to my lovely friend "H" who owns a tailoring shop.  She had H's tailor make a few dresses for her, but when H's father was in hospital, she didn't even call H to ask about her father.  When he passed away (Allah rest his soul), she didn't call H to give her condolences.  When she wanted more clothes from H's partner about a month later, she feigned embarassment:  "I'm ashamed I didn't give her condolences on her father's death".  I told her "Well, now's you chance".  Amazingly and disappointingly she still didn't do it even as she bought a pileful of Moroccan jalabiyyahs at an amazing price from H's partner. The words  "thank you" did not even pass from her lips. Later on she told me that she just "didn't feel like it". She wanted to show me that my friend H meant nothing to her solely because she knew how much I love H.

Why did I tolerate her for so long?  Because I am patient and I pick my fights carefully.  So I let all her nasty little comments and deeds go, only because I felt that arguing with a fool makes me a fool too. Sometimes people mistake patience for weakness.

I was waiting for a chance to get her out of my life for a very long time but it was difficult because we are married to brothers. Thankfully, she moved house further away and she made it easy for me to make a full break (I knew she inevitably would) by picking a senseless fight on a day when I had absolutely no patience for her nonsense.

She called me to complain and accuse me and the other brother's wife of being jealous of her new house (really??).  When I told her I prefer to be far from her and I don't want her calling me to gossip about other people, she went berserk, insulted me and said that I was selfish, did not support her in her vendettas against other friends and I am envious of her and everything she has.  So I said, "Oh well!  If  I'm all those things then what do you want with me anyway?" 

It went back and forth for a while.  Oh God! How I hate bad drama! The call ended with a hint of desperation on her part.  She reckoned we have to stick together because everyone was jealous of our friendship (really???) and I shouldn't let them "win" by breaking it up.  It was starting to sound creepy and I knew then that she was out of her mind!  Soon after that she tried to orchestrate a group effort in her campaign to malign me via of all things, Facebook.  (Damn you Mark Zuckenberg!!)  But as of now, the little group seems to have disintegrated. They were probably too jealous of her "beauty and riches". Hehehe!  You have to laugh at the dramatic lunacy of it all!

I Miss Nairobi...

Abu Dhabi has been blessed by rain these past couple of days and I'm ecstatic!  It's made me nostalgic. You see, I grew up in Nairobi, Kenya, which my grandma used to call "Ulaya Ndogo" (Little London) due to the grey, drizzly skies.  For several months of the year the rain poured and poured and poured.  I had to walk back home to change my uniform a couple of times because I fell in the mud just as I got to the school gate. I went on to misuse that "I fell in the mud" excuse several times when I was late for school until the teacher started to look at me suspiciously.  When I started high school, I changed to a school farther away and I had to use the bus.  Walking to the bus stop was a miserable affair.  Umbrellas were no use since the wind would whip the rain into you from the sides.  The bus itself is another story for another day, Kenya Bus Service!! Aaah! Good times!!  


I love Nairobi.  My family moved there when I was one month old. I've heard it called City in the Sun, which is true for some of the year, but what I miss the most is the rainy days when we would light a fire in the living room and bask in it's cosy warmth.  Most Nairobi houses have fireplaces.  It can get pretty cold. We sensed when comfort food would be needed in our house and at first sight of a grey cloud that soup pot would be on the fire. We would throw in meaty bones, carrots from the garden, celery, peas and whatever other veggies were at hand and season with plenty of black pepper. Potatoes would be added near the end.  Deliciously warming soup! I've tried to recreate that soup here but it never tastes as good.  It seems lacking.  Maybe some logs burning in the fireplace are the crucial, missing ingredient! 

Just for a Day....

It's been a minute since I was last here.  It's been work, work, and more work.  It's amazing how you can be so busy but seem to get nothing done at the same time.  Anyway here I am!

We have a Company Family Day coming up in early February and I registered myself as a  volunteer.  There'll be games like basketball shots, egg and spoon races, sack races (you'll never catch me in that!), hit the target,  for kids, ladies and adults (mixed).  Yes!!! Mixed games for adults!!

I am amazed that there actually will be games to be played as a family.  I have to see this. I want to see our normally kandoora and abaya clad selves letting ourselves go with our children.  I foretell that embarassment will prevail in the office for a week or so after the day but I want to be one of those who dares to be a kid again even if it's just for a day. 

Enough of the lowered voices and stiffened backs, the computer elbow will be straightened out on that day.   On that day we will not hear the quiet rustling of bakhoor (incense) soaked abayas, the smart clacking of Christian Louboutins and the more aggresive whooshing of the men's (also bakhoor'd) kandooras. We will be wearing sports clothes under our abayas, Converses, Nikes and Reeboks on our feet.

Yeah!  We need a good time too although I am the idiot who has agreed to be a volunteer at the kid's games section.  I'm sure I will regret it, but I really enjoy the company of young people, including my own, so I will take the good with the bad.  I think I've taught my own kids well but can I say the same for some of the rest of the people I work with?  But I won't let that dampen my enthusiasm. 

Ya Allah give me patience with all little monsters I may encounter, (including my own).  *Smile*

Leave Dubai Alone!

YouTuber Chris Crocker wailed "Leave Britney alone!!".   Now I'm wailing "Leave Dubai alone!"


Some of us are sick and tired of Dubai bashing. 
There have been some damaging articles in the UK press and other places about Dubai. The headlines go something like: "The Dark Side of Dubai", "The Desert Dream is Fading", "All that Glitters is not Gold",  "You Can't Get Rich Quick in Dubai Anymore" (yes, I made that one up but you get the drift!) blah blah blah!! There may be truth in these articles but if the Dubai Dream turns into a nightmare who should be blamed, really?   


I am no politician (just an opinionated individual) so bear with me if my facts are not your facts. 

Dubai has been called out on many violations and much has changed especially for large companies hiring thousands of labourers, but what do we expect them to do about those domestic workers who are so miserably mistreated by their employers that they hurl themselves out of fifth floor windows? Is it possible to police people inside their own homes?


Although the laws protecting domestic workers are in place, most of these workers don't have a clue about their rights.  Doesn't abuse have to be reported before the authorities can take action? Even in the most developed societies victims are reluctant to report their abusers.  How can we educate these workers about their rights when they come here already grown and many from countries where they have even less than here?  It's interesting to note that just as many of their tormentors are foreigners and some are from those same developed countries that raise a stink when they see human or animal rights violations. Evil is evil no matter where it's from.

Dubai has been hit hard by the recession just like the rest of the world.  I read about one traumatised woman living in her Range Rover, waiting for her husband to complete his jail term so they can go back to the UK together.  They've lost everything in the financial crisis. I feel for her although the fact that she is homeless yet sleeping in a luxury car is telling.  From what I understood from the article, they made some misjudgements in their business decisions and this coupled with the global recession, left them flat broke and debt-ridden in a very short time.  I have little financial market knowledge but how is this Dubai's fault?  We were taught in "A" level Economics that businesses fail sometimes. Like, duh!

There are many things wrong here just like in other parts of the world but what good does it do to just gloat, smirk and make exposes? This country is still very new. It took centuries for the finger pointers to get where they are now and Dubai is trying to do that in a few short decades so let's cut it some slack. It's like they're just waiting for a fail. They won't admit it but they want to see Dubai fail.


Unless we can be constructive and help correct what we perceive as injustice then let's just "Leave Dubai alone!"


Now just for laughs, here's Chris Crocker pleading Britney's case.

Patience is Paradise

Allah tells us in Al Quran Verse 39:10 :

"Verily the steadfast and those who patiently persevere will truly receive a reward without measure

and will be recompensed in full without count at the Day of Judgment."

And their recompense shall be Paradise, and silken garments, because they were patient.

 Reclining on raised thrones, they will see there neither the excessive heat of the sun, nor the excessive bitter cold, (as in Paradise there is no sun and no moon). The shade will be close upon them, and bunches of fruit will hang low within their reach. Vessels of silver and cups of crystal will be passed around amongst them, crystal-clear, made of silver. They will determine the measure of them according to their wishes. They will be given a cup (of wine) mixed with Zanjabeel, and a fountain called Salsabeel. Around them will (serve) boys of perpetual youth. If you see them, you would think they are scattered pearls. When you look there (in Paradise) you will see a delight (that cannot be imagined), and a Great Dominion. Their garments will be of fine green silk and gold embroidery. They will be adorned with bracelets of silver, and their Lord will give them a pure drink." [76:12-21]

Patience can lead you to Paradise.  It's the hardest thing sometimes, but so worth it in the end.  

Allah has promised the patient ones Paradise without count on The Last Day.  Without count was once explained to me.  The first meaning that came to mind was "without measure", but if you read more and think on it you will soon see a further meaning.  It also means that the patient ones will be forgiven and allowed to enter Jannah without having to stand in front of Allah to have their good and bad deeds recounted to them.  That is huuuge! Can you imagine the fear and shame of standing in front of Our Almighty Creator with all our bad deeds being read to us? So remember, at the culmination of our existence on this earth,  when we are all waiting for our turn to answer for our deeds, Allah will spare the ones who were patient with His Qadr from the fear of facing His Interrogation on The Last Day.

Isn't that hope inspiring?

This is for my sweet daughter who has faced a huge disappointment today.  Remember, we may not be able to control what happens to us, but we can control our reaction to it. Keep your head up, sweetie, (and everyone elso out there going through tough times). Allah will not burden you with more than you can bear and this too shall pass...xoxoxo

Men at Work

Asalaam alaykum.

So I'm hammering out this post at work in between mouthfuls of green tea. It's not that I don't have real work to do, it's just that I need to rant about this crazy dude working here.

He is so weird for so many reasons. I recently caught a glimpse of his raggedy, greying ponytail when he was adjusting his ghutra on the top of his head. He plays videos in his office and sings old Yemeni love songs in a loud, thick voice, bashing his palms on his desk in time to the music. When his friends visit his office, they have a blast, laughing and joking loud enough to blow your eardrums. 

And....He stares at women.  If you happen to meet him in the corridor, he loses his composure, then recovering, he will puff up his chest, broaden his shoulders and stare. He will even turn around to look at you from from behind.  It's horrible!  It's scary because he has very big, red eyes. I hate being stared at like that! I don't have to deal with him professionally, his work is not even remotely related to mine, but his office is directly opposite mine.(I call mine an office but really it's just a large cubicle).

My sweet friend called me for a natter the other day, and as I was quietly giggling at a joke, Mr. Big Eyes stepped out, scowling.  He walked right past my office straight to his secretary in the next office.  I heard mumbling for a few minutes and then he walked back to his office and slammed the door.

Then his secretary called my extension and apologetically told me her boss asked her to tell me that I was laughing too loudly, not appropriate behaviour for a woman in the office, and if I laughed or talked loudly again then he would report me to my boss. 

Really???!!??  Now as I remember I was talking softly but I was worried so I asked the secretary if she had heard me laughing or talking? 

She said, "No, I didn't even know you were talking on the phone!  That guy is a jerk, we all hate him!  He likes women to smile and laugh with him, and you ignore him. Just give him a smile every now and then and keep a low profile for a while until he finds something else to be a jerk about!" 

Whaaaaaaat....??!!??

So now I'm being made to feel like I'm a mannerless fishwoman who doesn't know how to behave in public because this guy needs attention?

My job is very important to me so I've been doing my best to talk very softly since then, but I will not smile at him. I refuse to pander to his fading sense of masculinity.

Meanwhile I'm thinking of blowing this picture up and putting it up on my wall. Heeheehee!

Care(less) Clinic



Danger!!  Keep Away



I have absolutely no confidence in the medical system over here. Noone I know does. I'm just telling it like it is.  The nurses who couldn't make it to USA, Canada, Australia or anywhere else flock here. And let's face it the majority of the doctors recruited here are the ones that would not be missed in their home countries.

A tiny example:

I had to go to the Cleveland Clinic run government family clinic for a check-up. (Isn't Cleveland always the laughing stock in US tv shows?  just sayin'...).  My appointment was for 5:30 pm.  I was there by 5:15 pm knowing that I had a higher chance of piloting the Space Shuttle to Mars than seeing the doctor at the appointed time. But I just can't unlearn the punctual ways I was taught, nor would I want to. The nurse called my name for the usual preliminary checks of weight, height, BP, etc. The phone rings.

Nurse:  'Aiii! Hello Doctor!" *puts the call on speaker phone as she checks my temperature*.

Doctor:  "Girlie, I need to prescribe medication for patient xyz. Her weight is not recorded in the file.  Could you please check the weight of the patient in your file?"

Nurse (Girlie): "Aiii! Eet ees not recorded??' *immediately proceeding to cover her ass*  "It was Lita who weighted (!) the  patient, doctooor, maybe she just forgooot". 
Then: "Eet's oqay doctor!  I weel check!" *opens a file on her desk*

"Erm, erm..Doctooor, da patient is 5.6 kilos, "

Doctor:  "Thank you, Girlie!" *hangs up*

2 minutes later the Doctor calls back

Doctor: "5.6 kilos?? The patient is 8 years old! How can that be? Please check in the computer this time" (Meanwhile I'm thinking,  "It took "Doctooor" 2 whole minutes to realise this?!")

Girlie: "Aii, sorreee Doctooor! Oqay I weel check again!" *very long pause as she checks the computer muttering under her breath* 
           
Then she triumphantly announces:  "Doctooor,  here it eees! Da patient ees 68 kilos!"

Aiiiiii!

Can a normal 8 year old weigh 68 kilos?

I'm just saying, if they can't even read a scale or record weight properly then Lord help us all!!